Goodbye To The F-Bombs?

This just in….

1.) With the advent of a salary cap, Pierre LaCroix has decided to rethink his position regarding management of Celine Dion.

2.) To re-sign Alex Tanguay, Milan Hejduk, and David Aebischer, the “F-Bombs” (Adam Foote and Peter Forsberg) are likely to go. Where? The Rangers or the Leafs – duh!

3.) Don’t count on the departures of Kariya and Selanne just yet. They had a very contentious relationship with former coach Tony “what would you like in your coffee, Mr. LaCroix” Granato. This is much less likely to be the case with “player’s coach” Joel Quenville. Though, given Kariya’s fragility and generally sissified play, packing his My Little Pony handbag and sending him somewhere that would be a better fit (like Detroit – he could take McCarthy’s place!) doesn’t sound like a bad idea.

4.) Wouldn’t it just be a hoot and a holler if the Avs picked up McCarthy? The sheer entertainment possibility alone makes this an intriguing prospect.

5.) Would I like a different goalie? You bet. Will we get one? Doubt it. If we do? Probably Sean Burke. We like goalies with poor domestic relations skills. See, I said it before you could.

6.) If Foote goes, will John-Michael Liles finally get the respect he deserves? Let’s hope so.

7.) Do we need Radim Vrbata back? Absolutely.

8.) Will the Rangers and Leafs get every available free agent? Yes – except for Tie Domi, who will go to TNA wrestling and become Kevin Nash’s tag team partner.

9.) Will either of these teams win The Cup? No.

10.) Who will? The Adirondack Nighthawks, in 7 games.

Why is my Avs button purple? What in tarnation happened to this place while I was out making indoor lacrosse known to the ignorant American public?

Let the bashing begin,


80 Responses to Goodbye To The F-Bombs?

  1. defenestrate says:

    If you spend any of your DL time in rehab, you also get the Fleury Flask.

  2. Timaa says:

    Or, to be original, if not borderline racist, if Worrell was still on the Panthers and Brashear and Laraque joined him, they could be “The Black Panthers”. Sorry if that offended anyone.

  3. Marky2Fresh says:

    That ball hockey tourny they have every year on Young Street

  4. 19Yzerman says:

    I wouldn’t be as concern about offending any african americans as much as the “Black Pathers” Themselves who I am not sure of but, I think there are still some of them together. However I think they would feel Honored to see the Brashier, Laraque and Worrel line smashing heads while using their name. It could cause an increase of The Brothers watching hockey imagine that. I can see it now 1/2 of Detroit becoming Panthers fans from your idea.

    I was watching that commedian Simbad and he said, “Black people don’t watch a lot of hockey. I mean the only thing black in hockey is the puck and they be smacking it around with a stick!! Ya know what I’m sayin?”

  5. 19Yzerman says:

    The Boy named Sue league!!!

  6. Malurous says:

    Foote has just recently started to be not underrated, and you’re already saying he’s overrated? Biggest single reason for SLC gold.

    Agreed though, both are old and have ugly injury histories. They can’t be that important since the Avs don’t have them half of the time 😛

  7. Malurous says:

    Speaking of Lumme, he just managed to get a pro contract with his hometown team in the Finnish league after two years of shinny. It’s a source of much fun here. He’s a part-owner, so maybe that has something to do with it.

    It’s sad how a couple of bad years in the end can cast a shadow upon a very good NHL career. There are others (hiya Messier) who should take note.

  8. Malurous says:

    Nice to have you back D-Strate! There are never too many strange people with behavior problems here, although you don’t have everything going for yourself ’cause you know your stuff and can be reasoned with to an extent. So, because of lack of stupidity, you have no choice but to fall back to more primitive ways of being fun reading, such as good jokes.

    Maybe I shouldn’t have used the word “good” there, but anyway.

  9. brewstar03 says:

    Alright, time to answer the million dollar question!!!!

    How do you pronounce your name?


    ‘Crosses fingers’….

  10. defenestrate says:

    Now we just need to bring in the Hispanics.

  11. defenestrate says:

    Oddly enough, I understood everything you said.

    What’s wrong with you? What have they done to you? What have you become?

  12. defenestrate says:

    Nope. Proletariat to the core, that’s me.

  13. titans says:

    Well the world needs ditch diggers too!

  14. titans says:

    Lack of stupidity??? You don’t read many of his ramblings do you?

  15. nordiques100 says:

    like the mexicools?

  16. defenestrate says:

    Drinking that “haterade” again.

  17. defenestrate says:

    You win a block of government cheese!

  18. defenestrate says:

    Rage against the machine! Si Se Puede!

  19. lukeleim says:

    Lemieux? no, maybe savard or palffy man

  20. leafstopgun says:

    Good post to the point

  21. GretzNYR99 says:

    Hello George Laraque.

  22. GretzNYR99 says:

    I thought you got an official Theo Fleury coke vile and crackpipe with cracklighter.

    The Flask must be a sideshow.

  23. GretzNYR99 says:

    Was your english teacher named Butch, and did she also have a part-time job as the school janitor? Jeez, what’s in the water these days?

    K-Dogg probably crushed his nuts from grabbing his pants one too many times. I guess we’re not going to hear a follow up to his one-hit wonder.

    Nash has probably been hanging out with Scott Hall too much. If Alcoholism counts as an injury, Nash is probably FUBAR.

    Glad to see that someone remembers Harlem Heat. It’s true though, Worrell would be a better wrestler. Otherwise, he could have a career in carjacking and identity theft. He’d make millions.

  24. Flyer_Fan says:

    here’s two “F bombs”

    Flip Flap

  25. WLFHCommishJava says:

    “The only McCarthy’s I know hunted Commies and broke people’s jaws, and they weren’t named Darren.”

    joseph mccarthy had every right to track down the commies.

  26. GretzNYR99 says:

    Never said he didn’t.

  27. GretzNYR99 says:

    “Yeah Crock, I smell what you’re cookin’, and it smells like shit. But that’s okay, I like Shit.”

  28. defenestrate says:

    We’ll ignore the fact that most of them were only “commies” because he said they were, of course. This is the home of revisionist history, after all.

  29. Malurous says:

    Dunno, maybe being unclear enough is a good way to cope with this place.

    Or maybe being drunk during that message has something to do with it. Ahh, the holidays…

  30. GretzNYR99 says:

    Then again, isn’t every arab that lives in America a terrorist?

    “Blast off, it’s party time, and we DON’T live in a fascist nation”

    I suppose those terrorists are millionaires.

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