Goodbye To The F-Bombs?

This just in….

1.) With the advent of a salary cap, Pierre LaCroix has decided to rethink his position regarding management of Celine Dion.

2.) To re-sign Alex Tanguay, Milan Hejduk, and David Aebischer, the “F-Bombs” (Adam Foote and Peter Forsberg) are likely to go. Where? The Rangers or the Leafs – duh!

3.) Don’t count on the departures of Kariya and Selanne just yet. They had a very contentious relationship with former coach Tony “what would you like in your coffee, Mr. LaCroix” Granato. This is much less likely to be the case with “player’s coach” Joel Quenville. Though, given Kariya’s fragility and generally sissified play, packing his My Little Pony handbag and sending him somewhere that would be a better fit (like Detroit – he could take McCarthy’s place!) doesn’t sound like a bad idea.

4.) Wouldn’t it just be a hoot and a holler if the Avs picked up McCarthy? The sheer entertainment possibility alone makes this an intriguing prospect.

5.) Would I like a different goalie? You bet. Will we get one? Doubt it. If we do? Probably Sean Burke. We like goalies with poor domestic relations skills. See, I said it before you could.

6.) If Foote goes, will John-Michael Liles finally get the respect he deserves? Let’s hope so.

7.) Do we need Radim Vrbata back? Absolutely.

8.) Will the Rangers and Leafs get every available free agent? Yes – except for Tie Domi, who will go to TNA wrestling and become Kevin Nash’s tag team partner.

9.) Will either of these teams win The Cup? No.

10.) Who will? The Adirondack Nighthawks, in 7 games.

Why is my Avs button purple? What in tarnation happened to this place while I was out making indoor lacrosse known to the ignorant American public?

Let the bashing begin,