Slapshot Part III, Starring HTR Members

Time to drag out my favorite old “Strange Happenings” category again…..

I have a side bet with two people that this post will never see the light of day……..

Let’s take a few moments and do something that we may become all too familiar with if the impending CBA lockout becomes a grim reality. Yes, it’s time to once again tackle a topic that is only marginally related to the NHL. But it’s only fair, since I read all of those damn “Christmas Carol” posts and refrained from participating.

We all know that we paint certain images in our minds of what other people out here in “cyberland” are really like, much as we form our own images of characters when we read a book (yes, a book – pages, printing press, that sort of thing). These images are invariably spoiled for us when the movie is made.

So – in this scenario, you have the script for the original “Slapshot” in front of you. You will cast it with people from HTR, based on your perceptions of them from your interactions in our little global village. Simple enough. No outright vindictiveness, unless it is exceedingly well-disguised.

Reg Dunlop – I’m afraid I have to take this one myself, due to my advanced age, lack of ability to keep up with you kids, and propensity to mess with people’s heads for obscure reasons.

Ned Braden – I have to nominate Cwthrash for this one, with Lint07 as a runner-up. Both of them stand out as the intellegentsia on this site. (You too, Primis).

The Hanson Brothers – My all-time favorite hockey characters…but just a wee bit “out there”. Let’s go with Matteo, Rampage Winger, and Titans.

Our French-Canadian goalie, Denis LemieuxOld Nord. No other choice.

The perpetually priapic, foul-mouthed defensemen whose name escapes me at the moment – Everyone on this site under the age of majority who still considers swearing “cool”, or thinks that people who use multi-syllabic words are “gay”. That’s right, kids – fear what you don’t understand.

Dickie Dunn – The Mikster himself. “If Dickie Dunn wrote it, it must be true”.

HanrahanAmericasteamRedWings. ‘Nuff said.

Ogie Ogilthorpe – You know I’ve reached a peaceful accord with you, but I have to nominate you, Expert. Take it as a compliment that you’re so notorious.

Tim “Dr. Hook” McCracken – No choice here. The Big Booty himself.

Rink announcerStarsgirl25, no doubt (B.U!).

Dave “Killer” Carlson – I am far too politically correct to say. “Dave’s a killer”; “Dave’s a mess”.

Next – we recast “Youngblood”! Although I think “Full Metal Jacket” would be much more fun….