The NY Rangers .. The Bermuda Triangle of Hockey

Are the NY Rangers the Bermuda Triangle of Hockey? It seems talented players go there never to be seen or heard from again.
They signed their franchise center away from one of their rivals and touted him to be one of the vital missing pieces to the puzzle. To date, said franchise center has missed more games in his first 2 months as a Ranger than he missed in 6 YEARS as a NJ Devil. Coincidence or conspiracy? You decide. To top it off, the crack medical staff in NY took a few weeks before properly diagnosing the injury, 2 partial ligament tears. When asked when Holik would be able to play again the crack medical staff could only give a time frame of anywhere from 5 days to next year. The NYR have now been rumored to be looking for reputable psychics to join their medical staff as the psychics have more credibility and can give a more accurate injury recovery time.

We won’t even touch Mr. “Is someone’s phone ringing?” Richter. It took the crack Rangers staff being made a laughing stock to finally publicly diagnose him with a concussion. I mean, how many days can you, with a straight face, walk up to the press and say “Yea, he has bad headaches and he’s woozy, but it’s not a concussion.”

The other signing this year, Darius “2nd worst +/- in the league” Kasparitus. The man who was going stabilize the Rangers blueline. What else is there to say but that the rangers pissed away another boatload of money. Something tells me that the Avalanche knew what they were doing when they didn’t resign him.

Also missing are Sathers Saviors from last year. In other words last year’s “missing pieces for the cup run” Eric Lindros and Pavel Bure. If found, please return them to the NYR as they’ve been looking for those 2 since the beginning of the year. Pavel has fewer goals than Mark Messier and Lindros with only 2 goals has 1/3rd the goals of linemate Rem Murry (that’s right Rem freaking Murray). Lindros with 8 points on the year and Bure with 11 points on the year (Bure with no points in 8 games) have been out played by a 40 year old man and a nobody.

Bure and Lindros are point a game players who just haven’t gotten it done in NY this year. Both are mired in the LONGEST SLUMPS of their careers, at the same time! Not to mention that they go on a winning streak as soon as their “savior” coach is suspended and lose again when he’s back behind the bench.

What in the name of Rocket Richard is going on here! No wonder Hitch***** couldn’t decline NY’s coaching offer fast enough and bolted for division rival Philadelphia.


22 Responses to The NY Rangers .. The Bermuda Triangle of Hockey

  1. MantaRay says:

    This is actually a very good piece. My compliments.

    One mistake: Hitchcock was never a consideration for the Ranger job. Sather all along wanted another lacky and found one in Trottier.

    Hitchcock would have cured the Triangle.

  2. rrudd says:

    i concur, mr. ray.

  3. edmontonrules says:

    Ha ha. Let’s all laugh at the Rangers. But seriously, it is really funny. And sad. The Rangers just go after the “best” free agents. They probably don’t even scout them. Now even Sather is doing it. I sometimes think that I would do better running the Rangers. That reminds me. Mikster, if you are reading this, we sould have a page that allows us to say what kind of trades (legitimate) and other stuff you would do with your favorite team.

  4. Flyers_01 says:

    The ESPN NY Rangers Fantasy Hockey correspondant. If anyone get’s the chance to read him I highly recommend it. I have never read a guy so in need of an intervention (including Titans) over the sad state of his hockey team.

    Rangers fans are people to … I think.

  5. Cam says:

    I couldn’t agree more edmontonrules. At first after thoses signings i thought theymight make the playoffs. But after I watched a couple games. I realized this team still really sucks. The Canucks payroll is only $30 million. They are doing great. The rangers payroll is like $70 million and they suck ass. Yeah Colorado sure did know what they were doing when they didn’t sign Kasper. Oh yeah why I compared the Canucks with the Rangers is because I am Canucks fan and there payroll is low. It is going to up if they keep Nasuland,Bert,Jovo. I think and hope they will keep Jovo.

  6. hockeywhore says:

    the entire fricken league is a bermuda triangle. Zhamnov just scored his first goal of the year this year, and after about a month Tampa and Minnesota were leading almost leading their respective conferences. Through the first month, Hackett was making the 2002 hart trophy winner look like a barely suitable backup. The Rangers aren’t the only paradox in this league.

  7. BuTThEAd8889 says:

    GOOOOOOOOOOOO Rangers!!!!!FLYERS ARE GAY!!!!!!!!!!!LINDROS IS THE MAN….ROENICK AND PRIMEAU ARE GAY LOVERS!!!!AHAHAHAHAHAHHA

  8. Tradedude says:

    another senseless 10 yr old ranger fan dishing out flyers (which are almost 15 – 20 spots ahead of them).

  9. Tradedude says:

    Why does Trottier put Bure with Lindros, they hardly ever communicate, they don’t play well together, and they don’t even know each other name. lol.

  10. mikster says:

    Oh, then did they (Hitch and Slats) play monopoly when meeting and talking in NYC and in California?

  11. mikster says:

    You must be new here.

    If you post offensive comments, or just act idiotic and immature and annoy too many members. You’re given either strikes or you’ll just get banned.

    Just thought you should know that.

    Vice Admin

  12. Enchilada says:

    I think everything you say is true except the part where you say they are never heard from again because as soon as someone is traded or released from the big apple those players all of a sudden find their game again, for the most part anyway.

  13. mikster says:

    Lindros and Bure scored mad poins last season. They need a better LW to dig pucks and give them space.

  14. mikster says:

    It’s a good piece in a sense that you’re looking at 20 games from a fan’s point of you who dislikes the Rangers. Totally OK with me, reason why i posted it. I did reply yesterday but this site had problems and i couldn’t post it. SO, here is what i have to say.

    It’s 20 games into the season and this team has 3 new coaches, and 11 new players.

    Don’t blame the doctors, the Rangers have very good doctors actually, especially rehab trainers. Usually x-rays and mri’s are second step to take. First step is, most of the time, do a certain exercise(s) and take a medicine. If that does not work, then you go and take an x-ray or mri. I take an x-ray every 6 months for my shoulder. I have to do a certain exercise. Been going on for 2 years now, and so the next step could be an MRI, so my dad (doc) says.

    Anyway…cutting to the chase:

    I don’t think anyone should have expected this team to be 1st place or over .500. I said they’d be .500 at best. However, i could have been very wrong if Richter was 100%, Holik was 100%, and Lindros and Bure scored. If BUre and Lindros did score on a normal basis, the Rangers would definitely be over .500 since there are at least 4 games that the offense failed to win.

    Kasparaitis, or i should say Kasparminus, has been the most inconsistent defenseman on the Rangers. Plays good shifts, and bad ones. On the bad ones come the goals. As of late though, against SJ, CGY, and VAN, Kaspar is starting to play well.

    As for Lindros and Bure, i have no explanations. I really thik they need that puck digger and player to do the dirty work. Rem Murray does a good job on that line, but is not as strong in digging pucks and passing the puck. I am not worried about Lindros, ever since that bench he received from Trots he has played better each game, getting better chances and hasn’t taken a stupid penalty.

    Two lines are starting to come along very well. The Czechoslovakian-line and the Messier line is starting to do a very good job. The 4th line is an actual 4th line that the Rangers didn’t have in a while. The 1st line and the PP has to start scoring though. If the scoring comes, they will win games and get over .500. I am without doubts on that.

    Hitch and Slats talked for about a month. Slats started talking to Trots during the 2nd round of the playoffs. And, regardless of Hitch’s resume`, i never wanted him.

  15. Flyers_01 says:

    Do you think that Bure and Lindros really miss Rucinsky that much?

  16. mikster says:

    Not sure…., Rucinsky did a good in the ‘dirty job’, i think they both need to get their game going and definitely a lw to do that kind of dirty job and give them space.

  17. saksfan says:

    Rem Murry, Rem freaking Murray? Two different players? Anyways, great article. Sure hope Bure and Lindros keep this up for the rest of the season. :) What I’m worried about most is about the Avalanche. Horrible defense and PK as of late. Definitely need to improve that.

  18. Avalanche114 says:

    I am a big Bure fan, but what he is doing in NY is shameful. I live in New York so i watch these guys on a nightly basis. I don’t think Bure really fits in with the Rangers. In fact, the Rangers don’t really fit with the Rangers. Eric Lindros is a great power center and in theory if put with Bure could amount to an explosive combo, but lets face it, there is no chemistry, period. I don’t get signing Holik and not trading Nedved, they should have stuck with Mike York..

  19. Avalanche114 says:

    exactly but the retards keep getting centers..WHY???..oh well

  20. MantaRay says:

    Sathers meeting with Hitchcock was a standard PR tactic. He was never really a candidate

  21. Blade2 says:

    I saw on ESPN last year that the Rangers have spent nearly a quarter of a billion dollars on free agency,so here’s my list of MIA’s so far………

    Pat Lafontaine:collides with teammated Mike Keane for his 6th concussion to end his career after starting off good…….

    Kevin Stevens:ever since leaving Mario,even Gretzky couldn’t save his career in New York.Sucked hardcore in Boston after killing my Bruins for so long when he was a penguin

    Mike Keane:Wasn’t quite the same when he was with Colorado,goes from Wings killer to teammate killer…..so who’s the homer now??!!The first of leftover Avalanches New York falls victim to

    Theo Fleury:Even my hero ended up finishing soggy in Broadway,stop blaming it all on him dude…the second Avs leftover

    Jury is still out:

    Darius Kaspariatis:Jes man,they brought you over to play DEFENSE!!!

    Pavel Bure:I thought this cherrypicker scored goals!!For christs sake,if he can date Anna Kournikova,and score 60 goals….

    Bobby Holik:DEFENSE MAN,like you did in New JErsey!!!!

  22. Kujo says:

    Edmonton is not doing much better. Also the trade that sent York over there and Murray and Poti here is working out better for the Rangers. In case you didn’t know

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